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‘Lampi’ with negative feelings

I realized I have this when dealing with negative feelings. Like for example, when my manager told all sort of things that could upset me. At that moment, and few days later, I usually will still be OK. I feel OK. But after that, I start to feel sad + miserable + apathetic towards my work.

I think it’s because, at first I keep convincing and telling myself to be optimistic, “come on Najwa, be positive!”, thus I will brush the negative feeling aside.

And I guess it make things worse? The frustration actually keep building up, while I tried hard to ignore it. Hmm.. plus, nowadays, I have no one to talk to, which makes it worse I guess.

When my grandmother was alive, when I feel upset, I would always immediately talk to her. She would listen, entertain and made me feel a little bit better. It kind of helped to be honest. Sigh…

How I can safely receive deliveries in time of Covid-19

I’ve been panicking each time I receive a parcel. Tried many custom personal “SOP” but none ever works. I always get more panic and ended up thinking – “Shit, idk.. I think there’s a chance I might already got infected, I’m doomed. Oh God. But… Let’s wait for 14 days, I still hope I’m ok..”

So just now, I found this step. Pretty basic. But I’m still nervous though. Only people with anxiety disorder would understand.. sobs..

  • Ask for contact-free deliveries to minimise the risk of transmission from delivery drivers
  • Dispose of packaging immediately
  • Follow hand washing advice and thoroughly clean your hands after handling parcels
  • Regularly clean surfaces with anti-bacterial spray

Credit: WomenHealthMagazine

Update as of 25th March 2020:

I had to pick up a package that was being placed inside PosLaju’s EzyBox (cause apparently they don’t want to do home delivery if they don’t feel like it urgh). Here’s what I did;

  • I bring 2 bags
    • 1 paper bag to store the parcel
      I place this bag inside my car, to leave it for few days. If there’s any virus there, it should die without a host.
    • 1 reusable bag to put my belongings
      So I can place all items I brought out – keys, handphone, sanitizers, small wallet. And have them cleaned when I reached home.
  • As soon as I reached home;
    • Wash my hand.
    • Close front door.
    • Open door to laundry place.
    • Wash clothes I wore to go out.
    • Wash my hand.
    • Shower.
    • Clean/disinfect the items from the reusable bag.
    • Was the reusable bag.
    • Wash my hand.

At least when I did those, I panic less. Since I don’t place things all over the place, it took me less time to clean/disinfect the things. Yay me!!

Place to rant during CMO

OK, these few days, my panic attacked more often. One of reason is – too many bad, sad, annoying news regarding the virus and new government. Then there’s also my paranoias towards any foreign item I have to bring inside the house – parcel, letters, groceries.

So.. this will be my avenue to let go all of those frustrations, anger, worries… or anything that’s bothering my mind.